


Ask and you shall receive

by Amashi_zaino



Series: Skeletons in my closet [3]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Bad Puns, Bara!Sans, Biting, Ecto-Tongue (Undertale), F/M, Flirting, Good puns, Growling, Meddling Kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 03:22:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7417669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amashi_zaino/pseuds/Amashi_zaino
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sans is still with you, in a world where Undertale is just a video game and Monsters shouldn't exist.<br/>Yet here he is.<br/>Your asshole husband is gone and your daughter Crystal decides that Sans just needs a nudge to give him the encouragement to ask you out.</p><p>EDIT!: Updated because I somehow neglected to put in the steamy parts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ask and you shall receive

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah i'm turning this into a series of one shots, maybe two shots. 
> 
> This was written by me and yizukikhons22 who helped to keep me inspired. She wrote some of Sans's parts and gave me lots of encouragement. 
> 
> Thanks Yizu! :D
> 
> I edited the shit out of this cause it started as kind of an RP. I hope I did ok. 
> 
> SHIIIIT! I didn't put in the really really good part. Damn copy pasta, glitching out on me. STOP TRYING TO CENSOR ME YOU STUPID COMPUTER!!
> 
> So yeah, I edited this and put in the steamy part. Sorry for neglecting that. :p

Crystal and Sans were sitting on the couch in the living room on the main floor. Sponge Bob was playing but Sans was only half paying attention, his thoughts had been going back to the night almost a month ago that you'd shared with him under the stars. During that time he'd been there through some hard times for you, the divorce had been messy and expensive but Sans had had no problem giving you a couple of the gold coins he'd kept on him. You'd thanked him profusely which only made him blush slightly and shrug. “hey, it's just pocket change. no biggie.”

A commercial came on when Crystal's voice piped up "Hey...Sans? Are you gonna be my new daddy?" 

Sans was finishing off a bottle of Heinz 57 when the question takes him. He spit takes, coughs and blushes intensely. “Wh-What makes you say that kiddo?” He chuckles nervously.

Crystal looks at him 'innocently' "Well, whenever you look at my mom your eye light things turn into little hearts, and whenever she gives you a hug your face turns bright blue. I know you're blushing Sans. I'm not dumb. You like her, as in like like her."

He groans and slaps his hand over face to hide even darker blush.

“kid-should we really be havin' this conversation HERE?” He glances at door that leads to the basement/'game room' that your ex husband has set up

Crystal gives a Chara worthy smile as she leans in closer to whisper conspiratorially to him. "I have a secret for you Sans...she likes you toooo." she sing songs. "And! I'm willing to help you get the girl. but for a price." her smile turns sly as she wiggles her eyebrows.

Sans sighs, but glances back at Crystal. “heh. sorry kid. but i don't take dating advice from kids.”

That felt awkward.

Crystal's big brown eyes start to tear up as she gives him big puppy dog eyes. "But Saaans...no one knows my mom like I do. I know that dad's the lamest at being romantic. You could take her out stargazing. I mean if you give her a couple of those gold coins she could go buy a telescope. I'll even plant the idea to get you one for a 'gift'. It'll be romantic and awesome! C'mon." she pouts cutely. "And anyway, I only wanted a ride on one of your Gaster blasters for my advice." her voice soft and disappointed.

“kid...the gaster blasters ain't toys. they're weapons. yer ma would kill me if i let you ride on one, and then where would i be for your date?” He says as he ruffles their hair affectionately. 

Crystal ducks away while looking at Sans, her pout morphing into a lewd grin. "I bet you'd have no problem letting _her_ ride your “gaster blaster.”" she made the quotes in the air before bursting into a fit of giggles at his wide eyed expression. His whole skull is burning blue by her teasing which only made her grin more because her entire intention was to get under his proverbial skin.

The kid had no real tact and sadly in the day and age they lived in, sex was rife throughout the internet and television. Crystal watches him with a wide grin of her own. "What? Did I rattle your bones? The advice I gave you wasn't a fibula." 

"nice try kid, but you ain't exactly subtle." He chuckles as he stretches out his arms and lays casually back on the couch. Crystal lets out a huff that turns into a squeal halfway through as his arm snaked around her waist and trapped her against his side. White bony fingers sneaked around and began tickling at her sides. "still think you can give me advice kid? c'mon. i wanna hear it."

"Saaannns!" she giggled, trying to squirm away from his tickling.

"what you callin' me for? i thought you were the one handin' out the datin' advice."

"S-Stop! That tickles!"

"that's kinda the point kid. c'mon, don't leave me hangin' here throw me a bone."

Crystal squeals out a laugh as she squirms against his hard side. "Staaahp! Ok! Ok! I give! C'mon!" she tries to shove him but he doesn't even move due to the sheer size difference between them. 

He rumbles a laugh and his hand stills. "alright kiddo, lets hear it." 

Crystal huffs for a few minutes before squirming and gets the laptop to pull up a browser. "Alright, mom told me something about the monster money you have. It's gold right?" 

He nods watching her as she pulls up the gold to US dollar ratio showing him how much gold was worth per ounce. 

"See, those little coins you have are worth a fortune up here. Humans love their gold that's for sure. Kinda like dragons." She sits back and looks in thought for a second before pulling up a few sites around the area they lived in. "Look, there are some really good places to go star gazing. That's one idea. Another one is that we can go and visit my aunt Lynn out at her house in Spirit Lake. She lives out in the woods y'know? Well, I could start a mud fight, get mom all super dirty and gross and you could offer to teleport her home to change and get cleaned up. It'll give you some alone time with her without dad snooping. Heck, the divorce went through, and he's only over here every now and again to get clothes and anything he forgot before moving to live in the little trailer at Aunt Lynns. So that shouldn't be a factor." 

 

She has a look on her face full of determination. "Then you can make your move!" She pumps a fist in the air excitedly. 

Crystal's face softens and she gives Sans a smile, looking up at him sympathetically and pating his arm.

"It's too bad that there isn't a Grillbys here huh?" 

Sans sighed and gave her a small, sad smile. "yeah," is all he said, gently pulling her into his side and staring forward at the TV screen. Crystal looked up with concern at the skeleton, but he remained silent, grin etched into his face.

"Hey. It's okay Sans. We'll find a way to get you back. I know it!" She patted his sternum soothingly.

Sans tightened the arm around her briefly, pressing her closer to his side.

"heh. I hope so kid. i certainly hope so." he whispered.

"And then we can break the barrier, and we'll all live on the surface together and you and Mom can get married and we'll all be happy!"

Crystal gives him a wide confident smile. "You just gotta stay DETERMINED. Alright? I'd give you some of mine if I could...but then you'd probably go all goopy and melty and would start looking like Geno sans. gross."

"well, if you did then i could melt into her arms."

"Saaaaaannns! That was terrible! And She's supposed to melt into YOUR arms, not the other way around!"

"i dunno kiddo, i didn't think it was that cheesy, it was kinda gouda."

"Oh my god Sans....look. Just go and pun at her or something maybe you can woo her with your wit."

"you're the boss kid,"

In a single motion the large skeleton lifts himself off of the couch and walks out of the room, leaving the daughter slumped over on the cushions, still off balance from his abrupt absence.

Crystal looks up at him bewildered. "Sans, where are you going?"

"you just said to go pun at your ma kid." He teased, eyesockets lit with mischief "make up your mind"

Crystal giggles and gets up. "Oh man, this I gotta see. Lets go bonehead."

Crystal follows Sans downstairs where her mom is lounging on the bed, a chemistry book in her hands. Sans's presence had inspired her to actually stop procrastinating and get a head start on her classes for next semester. 

You look up at the duo and smile, the basement is pretty cold so you have a blanket wrapped around your spandex clad legs and your wearing a tight under-armor long sleeve shirt. Cody your ex isn't around having been pressured to go and live with his sister instead of mooching off of you and your parents. His absence has been a real lift to your spirits and the tension between Cody and Sans is finally gone which was a real relief

"'Sup munchkin? Wassap Sans? Do ya need somethin' hun?" 

Sans chuckles nervously and scratches at the back of his neck. "heh. Not really, just...wanted to ketchup with you?"

You laugh, "Well you know I always relish your company, but mayo always use the same puns Sans? I know you can do better." Grinning you wink at him and sets the book down to sit up more and give him your full attention.

"you'd think that i might think of some burger ones, but i can't seem to stomach it."

You snorted slightly at that while getting to your feet with your back facing the bed.

"Nice one, good to know your pun game is still on point. Hmm...I doubt I could ever meat your standards for PUNctual puns. ah well, I guess I just need to learn to roll with the PUNches and take my PUNishment eh?" You grin at him in a challenge.

Meanwhile Crystal is snickering behind Sans knowing that her mom was ready to match him pun for pun. At that last one, Sans gives a sultry smirk and lifted his browbones.

"you know me hon. i'd L O V E to give you a punishment." He said, flashing you a roguish grin.

You give a small laugh at that. "Crystal go upstairs please? I'd like to talk to Sans without ears listening in the cornfield." 

Crystal pouts slightly. "But moom...I want to hear the pun off." 

You give her a stern look. "Go." 

With a final whine the kid goes upstairs and closes the door at the top, but not before giving Sans a thumbs up and a small encouraging smile. 

Looking up at Sans your grin turns into a smirk. "Well that wasn't the *reaction* I was expecting. I guess we've just got good pun chemistry huh?" You hold up the book and gives him a wink.

You crossed your arms under your breasts and give him a lidded look. "And just so you know, I could take any PUNishment you might deal out and I'd probably ask for more."

"oh?" Sans asked, eye beginning to spark with a familiar blue fire. "are you S U R E you want to put that to the test babe? 'cause i gotta tell ya, ya shouldn't be writin' checks that this ass can't cash" he growls, his hand coming down to roughly grope your ass.

Filthy sinner though you might be, you were still a bit of a cinnamon roll when it came to forwardness like this and a small blush lined across your nose and cheeks. And yet you wasn't about to back down to his challenging air.

"I'm thinking that the only checking that's going on here is you checking out my ass. But I'm thinking that y'all just can't handle my sass darlin." You put a hand to his sternum to lightly rake your nails over it through his t-shirt. 

The skeleton let out a low growl at your cheek, normal grin splitting into a wider, predatory smile. His teeth unsealed to reveal the enlarged canines he had sunk into your neck all those nights ago. Even now, just looking at them you could feel the sharp enamel digging into your skin and sending a shiver down your spine.

The sight of the large canines and the aura of slight predatory intimidation made something clench low in your belly and your tongue darts out to wet your suddenly dry feeling lips. A nervous laugh shakily sounded from you. 

"Didn't think that we'd...I mean that you'd be wanting to take me to the bone zone before a first date. Unless you count going star gazing like we did."

A dark chuckle ripples up from his ribs. Slowly, sensually, Sans lowers his mouth back down to your neck. His hot breath skating across your throat as his eyes greedily drank in the goosebumps and quickened breath that his presence evoked. For a moment he stayed there, fangs barely brushing the tender skin, relishing the restless movements of you underneath him.

"you're right," with that he pulled back, stepping away and straightening back up. His teeth hid themselves again as his 'lips' pulled back into an arrogant grin at the thwarted look of annoyance on your face. 

You really was too cute when flustered.

You could barely believe it. One moment he's hot and heavy for you, acting like he's about to take you right there in the basement, and then he just-!

"What was that for?!" 

Sans snickered. "told ya babe. you shouldn't be writin' checks you can't cash."

"That wasn't cashing a check! That was a withdrawl! A MAJOR withdrawl!" Your face was flushed with embarrassment and arousal. Sans just put his hands in his hoodie pockets.

"figured i'd give ya a date before lettin' ya into the bonezone."

You blink up at him. "I...ah geeze." you slightly squirmed before him. "I still wouldn't be against...how would Papyrus put it? Canoodling a little before hand." You pout slightly from frustrated arousal. "But I have a suspicion that you're probably an 'all or nothing' kind of guy huh?"

You take a deep breath to collect yourself and push down your now raging libido. "But I'd be down for going on a date. As long as I'm with you I'm sure it won't be 'the pits' right?" you laugh nervously trying to make a joke to ease your quaking insides.

"whatever you'd like sweetheart," Sans says, giving you a gentle smile. One hand lifts out of his pocket to cup your cheek.

You smile softly and leaned into his hard hand, your own covers it and the sheer size was just another reminder of how small you are compared to him at a mere 5'1". 

"There isn't much we can do. Seeing that people tend to freak out at seeing a 6'5" skeleton walking around when it's not Halloween and Monsters don't exist here. But I'd be ok with a picnic, hell we're in Northern Idaho. I know some primo places that are secluded and we could even watch the sun set by the lake. Or I can get Crystal off to a friends for the night and we can watch a movie, play video games and have a quiet dinner here and cuddle on the bed." You gesture to the HDTV and Playstation 2 and 3 systems hooked up to it. 

You smirked. "Either way, you gotta make that AMAZING quiche that you do. Holy god it's good. I don't know what you do to it...well...I kinda do cause maagic,” You wiggle your fingers in the air making him chuckle. “christ on a cracker it's good!"

Sans let out a mirthful laugh at your enthusiasm, hard thumb stroking your cheek for a moment before lowering his hand again. "your daughter mentioned something about an Aunt and a lake. We could drop her off there and come back without having to worry about anyone...disturbing us."

Your hands lightly pressed against his hard sternum, rubbing small circles with your thumbs. "Darlin' I think I'm already pretty 'disturbed' as is seeing that I'm wanting to hook up with a giant skeleton monster." You laugh lightly at your own self depreciation. "Granted he's a funny, sexy, witty, charming and intelligent skeleton." You look up at him in thought, a finger tapping her lower lip with a smile. "hmm..in fact I can't think of any actual Cons to this arrangement." You wink at him before your voice falls flat. "Besides the fact that my daughter is trying to play Cupid. Oh gods...that's embarrassing." You put your hand over your eyes and laugh lightly. 

Sans softly pulls your hand away from your face and holds it gently. "can't say i'm complainin' it seems that it all worked out pretty well tibia-nest." 

That made you give a small huff of a laugh. "Though, for that tease from before...I feel that it's only fair that I return the gesture." 

Quickly you'd wrapped your hand around his arm and in one quick double step motion hooked his knee with yours and used a roll take down making him land on his back on the bed behind you. Quickly you climb on top of him so that your was straddling where his spine would be just below his large rib cage. You press yourself against his sternum, face close to his cervical vertebrae. His eyes were wide with shock at the motion eye flaring blue from surprise but was quickly hidden as his eye sockets closed when you lick a line up his neck column. 

"Undyne's not the only one that knows how to take down an opponent." your voice was low and breathy, almost a purr as your hands grasped at his thick collar bones.

You chuckle slightly, your body shaking over him. "Looks like you just got dunked Sugar skull."

Sans's gave a deep chuckle, "ya think so?" his hands circle around your waist and grip the soft flesh firmly, phalanges moving over the now exposed skin from where your shirt has ridden up. The pressure made your breath hitch and you retalliated by grinding your crotch down onto the part of his spine you are straddling. He gives a slight groan and turns his head to nuzzle the bend of your neck. "hon, yer playin' with fire here." 

You smirk into the bones of his neck. "I concur, you are hotter than Grillby. And he's literally made of fire." 

You lick up his neck column again and bite lightly at the thick bones and map out the dips and ridges with your tongue and teeth. His hips buck up slightly at the sensation but find nothing to get friction on which makes him groan. 

"If I'm playing with fire...as long as it's you..." you pulled back and leaned to hover over his smiling mouth your lips barely brushing the bone there. "I want to burn." 

With that you leaned in and planted a soft kiss on his mouth, your hands had not been idle, while your mouth was distracting him, your hands sneaked underneath his t-shirt and you were running your palms up over the broad bones of his rib cage. You grip the sides, and are only able to put your hands around one but you make use of the gaps between them to run your fingers up and over and behind the rib you're holding on to. 

One of Sans's arms go around you holding you tight as you tease his bones, the other slides into your hair to hold you close and move your head to the side, exposing a long line of slightly sun tanned neck. His left eye sparkes as his mouth openes and his translucent tongue snakes out to lick a long line from your clavicle to your jaw leaving a trail of lightly blue saliva in it's wake. Your entire body shudderes at the sensation of his magic tingling along your skin. "Saaanss..." you half whine, half groan which only makes him give a growling chuckle. 

"hmm? somethin' ya want sweetheart?"

You buck your hips, your grip tightening around him making him grunt slightly. "Youu...." You whisper as he nips at your throat. 

"not yet sweetcheeks. anything else maybe?"

You wriggle in his vice like grip. "bite me...please..please please please bite me." your voice is needy and pleading. The scent of your arousal thickening around them and the smell made him groan as he fought down his magic to keep it from coalescing in his shorts. 

His intimidating laugh rumbles through you making you give a small whine. 

He licked and nipped at the sensitive skin. "ya sure 'bout that sweetheart?" 

"YES! Sans please...please please yes!" The arm that had been around your middle had moved and his broad hand squeezed the swell of your ass, the tips of his phalanges brushing over heated heated sex. The feeling makes you wiggle and thrust yourself back into his fingers, hungry for more.  
Your voice was almost a sob as one hand left his shirt to hold onto the thick bones of his wrist, straining to try and get closer to those now exposed sharp canines nipping and teasing at your flushed skin. "please..." you whispered. 

Quick as a snake he sinks his teeth into the bend of your neck, careful to avoid any major arteries or veins. You give a keening cry as a shudder runs from the top of your head to your toes, your body is writhing on top of him, his hand in your hair keeping your head still while your hips bucked into him.

His sharp fangs had actually punctured the skin but the build up had been so intense that the extra sensation sent you over the edge making a fresh wave of your arousal's and now release's scent wash over him. 

He growls animalistically, the only thought went through his head as you spasm over him, and his fingers pushed firmer into your legging covered pussy lip. 

*MINE.*


End file.
